what a great place.. what a new experience this time .. oh man
"the best i never had."
from tonights pract.. eduardo and chester are hella funny to me cuz we got close to the same type of humor. fuck i laugh just thinking about hah
i love vince. he says the right things i think and he just knows what hes talking about. if there was an ultimate friend he is it .. or so many ppl have said and i kinda see it now.
ashley.. is hella coool. she knows what to say without making me shy about saying anything. i really didnt think this friendship would bloom so quickly.
- Mood:
hungry
- Mood:
confused
hmm.. so the way you tap me when im not lookin as your "hi" cuz i didnt present you any attention at all, is just all too nostalgic for me. we ignore eachother the whole night for a real nice goodbye. hmmm -.-
maybe ill start a new conversation next time with "do you know how to braid?" .. but i already used that like twice hah
and i just dont have the strength to start something right now. fuck me for throwing away such an opportunistic mind.
-i needed a thong, now eye liner. hrm
i think its a good idea to play some nice slow jams when writing in this.. in anything, studying, cleaning, showering, playing basketball, and even sex [oh yes], music seems to enhance the experience. and with this little journaling thing.. i find it arises new thoughts and if not, it makes the thought process all the more intriguing. half i cant even write down when i know i should.
-id be lying if i said i didnt miss you, but shit, sometimes you cant let go of the past... i think youll never understand. but thats just me
hmm . i wish you can live through the ages 1-20 like 5 times and choose which outta the five you want to stay with you forever
- Music:girl on tv- lfo *movie- fighting [weak]
- Mood:
aggravated - Music:space jam theme *movie- 13 going on 30. =]
but anyways thats why im like fuccccccckkkk
- Mood:
hot
listening and seeing my mom pour out her emotions with tears...is one of the hardest things to cope with. how helpless i felt because there was nothing i could say to make her feel a little bit better except "i love you". so how helpless she feels.. when you get older you often remember the way you treated your mom and wish you never did some of the things you did. regretful a little, yeea. i think i am. but growing up i dont remember a time when i honestly hated my mom. how crazy it is when i think of everything shes done and gone through...
how lucky i am
and how unlucky i am to have to worry about my next anatomy test =P. my lab class is pretty funny to me.. hah. it amazes me what i think about when i enter that class and just see how ppl act. all cool people dont get me wrong, just so different in so many ways. shout out to t.a. jessica for spending overtime to help me
- Music:perfect fan- bsb *movie-indiana jones >when i watch this i jwanna be adventurous
.. when i can do this i know ill be alright. regardless of anything..
-school, basketball, school basketball... school basketball. i dont think im missin anything am i?
i miss the singles already, but facccckk toooo itchy fohhh me. plenty of pics for sure.
for some reason i was just so damn attracted to her... i was like daym... i had lost interest in this girl already, but how quick that can all change with a new look. or maybe how quick it can all change with a new OUTlook on her... yea? haha but like they say.. beauty is in the eye of the beholder.. fuck i believe it.
and i hate when ppl tell me GOOD news tooooooooooooooooo late. thank you for taking away my moment[s] >=T. "oh you didnt know?" - yea whatever, shut up.
my predictions were right.. so surprised-none. there was no way you coulda made a believer outta me
oh yes please holla at me. free number,no stumbler. i said please holla at me
- Music:*movie- fast & furious
two songs that i hated for my own reasons back in the day.. revive itself in my own self thoughts and emotions.. i put the past behind me and move on from there... no more haunting thoughts, because ive been made weak through trust. so where am i to blame.. its a cycle im so familiar too.. i cant even be optimistic anymore... *honestly, soooooooooo patiently waiting for that moment/moments to make me feel like everything will be alright. let a dood be emotional for once..
who knows em?
God knows that you're a sexy thang
It's taking everything in me
Not to kiss you over under
Feel your inside feel my thunder
How the hell could I not want you
Girl you don't have to be a thang
I'll wait for you, You wait for me (baby)
Cuz true love's insisting
We don't have to rush at all (baby yeah)
These are the times we all wish for
The moment when less means so much more
We don't have to do a thing at all
We can take our time and talk
And this is the way things need to be
No pressure from you and none from me
Just let the mood set the moment off
We can make love or not at all
Been thinking bout you all the time
Morning noon and supper time
Tear you up in little pieces
Swallow you like reeses pieces
Come on girl you know I need it
(I know) It aint suppose to be a thing
(I know) I'll wait for you, you wait for me
(And I know) Cuz true love's insisting we don't have to rush at at all
------------------------------------
Girl I understand you're loyal to your man
And that's alright aww baby
But that dont change the fact
That you fine and you stay crying every night nah baby
Girl you got to let him know
You can't live like this no more
Nah baby
Can't you see
Together you and me could be so special ah baby
Our feelings get greater
A million days later
Talking all night please stay up but
Here comes ya ex
Returned with that drama and stress
All the nonsense that you just left but yet
You accept and go back to try it again
Then return with a broken heart
That I gotta mend
That's unfair
I've only been your lover and friend
And homey there he just front and pretend
But you dont care the life he leads
Is unsafe
I would never place my hands to your face
But still I chase
Cat and mouse
First you kick him out
Then you at his house
What is that about
I cant figure you out
Even your friends said I was better
But you listen to them
Never like uh-uh whatever
So the next time he hurts you again
You already knew where you should've been
And that's with me
All the times
You 2way telling me
That you miss me
Wanting me to come over and keep you busy
Remember that
Now that you gone
It's been kinda hard
Cant think, cant sleep
Cant do nothing at all
Just tell me why you had to go back
See you aint have to go through that
My baby
You could've been here right by my side
Me and you at the park taking walks outside
But
Instead, I keep on having these dreams
Waiting for my phone to ring
My baby wishing that it would be you But I know that wont come true
- Location:at my apt
- Music:read em